Regardless of how much I prepare, being away from Katie is always tough. At ten months old, it feels like she’s growing leaps and bounds each day.  When I accepted my new role, following 4.5 months of maternity leave, I knew that it would involve some travel but, my manager, who is also a mom, told me that she would do her best to work with me to manage the travel schedule and help me prioritize. Since returning to work on November 1st, I’ve traveled six times – two times to San Francisco, one time to Cincinnati and three times to Arkansas. Since taking my first business trip, back in November, Bo and I have learned quite a few things that help make the time away more manageable for all of us. It’s important to note that my travel isn’t just tough on me but it also puts a strain on Bo, as it requires more of him while I’m away since he is responsible for all of the tasks that we typically share each day.

Here are a few things we’ve done to make business travel easier for our family.

• Realize it’s okay to ask for help. We are so lucky to have two sets of very supportive parents. When I was considering whether or not to accept this position, both sets of grandparents offered to help when I traveled. While we know it isn’t realistic for them to travel up from Savannah, Georgia every time I travel, we’ve enrolled their help for the two longer, four-day trips. Since I leave early on Monday and return after Katie goes to bed on Thursday, it’s very helpful to have them here to help Bo. It has also provided an opportunity for them to have special bonding time with Katie since they typically choose to keep her home from nanny share when they are here. For my shorter trips, which are typically two nights, we make sure that our nanny knows that I’m out of town as well as our close friends who live three blocks away. That way, if anything comes up for Bo, he has a local support system.

• Stay in touch leveraging Facetime and a video monitor. The first trip, Bo and I struggled with the time change and found each other constantly missing the other when we called or tried to Facetime. Since that trip, we’ve talked in advance and scheduled a time to connect via video each day. Most trips, we Facetime at 7:30 AM EST when Katie is finishing her bottle and then again around 6:30 PM right before bath time. It can mean an early wake up depending on where I’m traveling but that quality time with her is worth it. I also “check in” on her each night before I go to bed using the Nest app on the phone that allows me to see her nursery since we have a Nest cam set up above her crib. A few readers have recommended sending videos back and forth as this helps avoid time zone complications and then children can watch the video over and over.
• Preparing for the week can help minimize stress. It took three trips for me to realize that the easiest way for me to minimize my anxiety about Katie was to take matters into my own hands and prepare ahead. Instead of worrying whether Bo would remember to take her foods to nanny share, find her outfits, or figure out her breakfast food I now devote about an hour the day before I leave for travel preparing everything. I lay her outfits out in the nursery so he can easily grab them, I restock the diaper bag and the diaper drawers upstairs and downstairs, I check to make sure we have plenty of formula and Camilia (our teething lifesaver) and I prepare her meals for the week so we can easily take it to the nanny share at the beginning of the week instead of daily. Don’t get me wrong, Bo is a great partner and a supportive parent who could most likely do all of this on his own. But, why make him worry about it when it’s easy to plan ahead?

• Stay busy and try to enjoy the alone time.  Many moms quickly recommended that the best thing I could do during business travel was to stay busy and focus on ME. At first, I didn’t know what they meant but then, the first evening in Arkansas that I finished work and realized I didn’t have any evening plans, I felt lonely. Instead of focusing on Katie and Bo, I made a quick list in my mind of all the things I rarely have time to do back home – manicure, working out, relaxing, going to dinner with friends. Now, before leaving for a business trip I review my schedule and anytime I have large gaps of time outside working hours, I try to take advantage of it by scheduling dinner with friends who live in that town, looking up local nail salons on Yelp and booking a manicure or having a good book or show on my iPad to enjoy. This week in Arkansas I spent one evening reading for two hours in bed while sipping wine and eating Whole Foods hot bar for dinner. It was wonderful to just relax by myself for a bit.  Since I don’t have the extra responsibility of getting Katie fed and ready for the day when I’m traveling I set my alarm for a nice, long workout session every morning. Sometimes I’ll try a local studio and others I’ll head down to the hotel gym for a run or strength session. It feels so nice to have this uninterrupted workout time and is truly a treat and privilege.
• Ask for extra pictures. When I travel, I ask Bo and our nanny to send me extra pictures during the day since I know I’ll be missing Katie and these little surprises light up my day. My parents were so adorable when they came this week and sent me at least two or three pictures each day in addition to a few videos and Facetime dates. It seems silly but I promise it helps, especially when they show up unexpectedly.

Your turn: I’d appreciate any other tips or tricks for making time away from your child more manageable.